Guess what? I just went out to dinner with some good friends from college that are also student teaching this semester. And our brand new friends from the UK.
It was an absolute blast.
I ate chips, salsa, and guacamole. I ate a couple of chicken tenders. I ate a quarter of a quesadilla. I ate some french fries. And I drank four beers.
And now I feel guilty. Unbelievably guilty.
I miss the days when I could eat without worrying about every single calorie that I put into my mouth. Before I go out to eat, I always have good intentions of ordering something healthy. But often, I get caught in the moment. I want to eat what I love at that restaurant, not what is most health-concious. I want to enjoy the same food and drink that my friends are enjoying.
Unfortunately, we aren’t all born with the same body. I have many friends who can eat what they want, exercise rarely, and remain thin. This is not the case for me. And you know what? It sucks.
I will wake up in the morning and move on with my life. I’ll work out and do my best to resume healthy eating tomorrow. But it doesn’t change the way that I feel now. And I wish that I could rid myself of this emotionally unstable relationship with food.